How fathers in Gaza are coping with the ‘immense weight of responsibility’

Months under Israeli bombardment and the specter of famine have placed additional strain on fathers in Gaza, whose inability to shield their young sons and daughters from the horrors of war is exacting a heavy psychological toll. (Reuters)
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Updated 21 March 2024
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How fathers in Gaza are coping with the ‘immense weight of responsibility’

  • Inability to shield young sons and daughters from the horrors of war can produce feelings of anger and guilt
  • Looming famine places additional strain on fathers, who are traditionally the primary household breadwinners

LONDON: Ahmed’s plans for his eagerly anticipated first child were shattered when the Israeli military bombed his home in Sabra, in western Gaza, on Oct. 26 last year.

In his telling, among the possessions destroyed in the attack was a nursery that he and his wife had lovingly decorated.

“All the preparations we made to ensure our first baby arrives in a beautiful world have been completely overturned,” Ahmed, 28, an expectant Palestinian father now displaced to Rafah in southern Gaza, told Arab News.

“The onslaught has shattered our dreams for our baby girl. The nursery, our home, and the family house have all been turned to rubble.”




The Israeli government says its military does not target civilians or hospitals. (AFP)

Since the Hamas-led attack of Oct. 7 that triggered Israel’s continued military offensive in Gaza, countless images from the embattled enclave have shown fathers carrying their wounded children, cradling their lifeless bodies, and pleading for help for their starving families.

One video that caught the world’s attention in November showed a Palestinian father holding his lifeless daughter in his arms, reminiscing about her life, and calling her in Arabic “the soul of my soul,” which conveys profound love and affection.

Expected to protect and provide for their families, fathers in Gaza are shouldering “an immense weight of responsibility,” Jeeda Alhakim, a specialist counseling psychologist at City, University of London, told Arab News.

These fathers “may want to try to shield their children from the harsh realities of the war,” said Alhakim, but “it is very difficult in Gaza to do so because there is no sense of safety for anyone at this stage.”

At the same time, fathers in Gaza are “struggling with trauma themselves and may be grieving in the same way that their children would be.”

Often the primary breadwinner in Palestinian households, fathers are frequently under “a lot of strain” if they are unable to provide for their families.

“This may also evoke a range of different feelings, such as anger, irritability, low sense of self or low moods, as well as anxiety and stress.”

Many fathers, concerned about their children’s future “may also feel guilt, as they are unable to protect their children,” Alhakim added.




Fathers in Gaza “may experience feelings of helplessness and powerlessness as they strive to protect and provide for their families and their children but find themselves unable to do so,” Jeeda Alhakim said. (AFP)

At least 13,000 Palestinian children have been killed since the conflict began, according to UNICEF, the UN children’s agency.

With famine looming due to the prolonged siege, the destruction of infrastructure, and aid failing to reach families in northern Gaza, fathers in some areas have resorted to scavenging rotten vegetables, leaves, and even animal feed to alleviate their children’s hunger.

On Monday, the EU’s top diplomat, Josep Borrell, accused Israel of using starvation as a weapon of war in Gaza. Speaking at a conference in Brussels, he said the enclave was now “in a state of famine, affecting thousands of people.”

Under these circumstances, fathers in Gaza “may experience feelings of helplessness and powerlessness as they strive to protect and provide for their families and their children but find themselves unable to do so,” said Alhakim.

Earlier this month, one father in Gaza encapsulated the desperation of many Palestinian families in an interview with BBC Arabic’s Gaza Lifeline radio service after his baby son, Ali, died of malnutrition and dehydration.

“Ali was born in wartime and there was no food or anything for his mother to eat — a matter which caused his kidneys to fail,” he told the BBC.




At least 13,000 Palestinian children have been killed since the conflict began, according to UNICEF. (AFP)

The UN Relief and Works Agency for Palestine Refugees in the Near East, UNRWA, warned on Saturday that one in three children under the age of two in Gaza is acutely malnourished.

This extremely vulnerable group includes the more than 20,000 babies born in Gaza since the start of the war, according to UNICEF.

The trauma familiar to these young families has perhaps been more keenly felt by those who had struggled to become pregnant before the conflict. What should have been a happy miracle has instead turned into a terrifying responsibility.

Ahmed said he and his wife underwent several medical tests after two years of trying for a child. They were told exposure to toxic fumes from a past Israeli bombing incident had affected Ahmed’s fertility.

INNUMBERS

• 20k+ Babies born in Gaza since the outbreak of war.

• 13k+ Children killed in Gaza since Oct. 7.

• 1/3 Children under age 2 deemed malnourished.

After undergoing treatment for several months, the couple finally managed to conceive. “I was overcome with joy when my wife told me she was pregnant,” said Ahmed.

“Before the hostilities, my wife was in her second trimester, and so we were decorating the baby’s room in our home and buying baby clothes. All of that is gone, and we can’t replace the lost baby clothes because these are no longer available in Gaza’s markets. Diapers and baby formula are also very hard to find and come at exorbitant prices.”

Ahmad and his wife have also lost the doctor who was scheduled to deliver their daughter.




Many fathers, concerned about their children’s future “may also feel guilt, as they are unable to protect their children,” Jeeda Alhakim said. (AFP)

“Even the doctor who was supposed to deliver our baby is no longer here — she managed to flee because, I think, she has a Russian passport,” said Ahmad. “There is no adequate hospital for my wife to have our baby.”

The World Health Organization says only 30 percent of Gaza’s medics are still working.

Meanwhile, just nine of Gaza’s 36 health facilities are still functioning, most only partially, and all at many times their intended capacity after months under intense bombardment and supply shortages.

The Israeli government says its military does not target civilians or hospitals, and blames Hamas for conducting military operations and launching rockets from crowded residential areas.

Ahmed said he is deeply concerned for his wife’s well-being in displacement. “The living conditions are particularly harsh for pregnant women,” he said. “There is no food or drinking water.”

At least 60,000 pregnant women in Gaza suffer from malnutrition, dehydration, and a lack of access to healthcare, according to Gaza’s health ministry.




Since Oct.7, countless images from Gaza have shown fathers carrying their wounded children, cradling their lifeless bodies, and pleading for help for their starving families. (AFP)

Earlier this month, the ministry said about 5,000 women are going into labor each month amid “harsh, unsafe and unhealthy conditions as a result of bombardment and displacement.”

Many have undergone C-sections without any anesthetic, pain relief, sterilization, or antibiotics. Babies are often born on floors and into tin baths filled with warm water.

New parents bringing life into the world amid these extreme conditions suffer “a loss of potential identity and purpose,” said Alhakim.

“If they have a sense of identity that’s attached to parenthood or to being a father, or if they find purpose in taking care of their children — then the war in Gaza has stripped them of this.”


Two Egyptian pilots killed in helicopter crash in Suez: army

Updated 2 sec ago
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Two Egyptian pilots killed in helicopter crash in Suez: army

The Egyptian air force operates aircraft from various countries

CAIRO: Two Egyptian air force officers were killed on Tuesday when a helicopter crashed during a training exercise, the military said.
The helicopter went down near a key air base in the town of Shalufa, in Suez province, “due to a technical malfunction,” military spokesman Gharib Abdel Hafez said in a post on his official Facebook page.
He did not specify the manufacturer or model of the aircraft.
The Egyptian air force operates aircraft from various countries, including France, Russia and the United States.
In November 2022, the military said a fighter jet had crashed during a military exercise but it reported no casualties.
In December 2019, an aircraft crashed during a training exercise. The pilot ejected safely.

US soldier injured during Gaza pier operation has died: military

Updated 15 min 56 sec ago
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US soldier injured during Gaza pier operation has died: military

  • “It is with great sadness that we announce the passing of Sgt. Quandarius Davon Stanley,” Captain Shkeila Milford-Glover said
  • In addition to the injuries, the project faced other problems starting in May, when the pier was damaged by bad weather and had to be removed for repairs

WASHINGTON: An American soldier has died after being injured during Washington’s problem-plagued operation to establish a temporary aid pier on the coast of Gaza, the US military said Tuesday.
The pier effort aimed to boost deliveries of desperately needed humanitarian assistance into the war-wracked Palestinian territory as Israel held up shipments by land.
But the effort ran into repeated weather issues and the United States ended it in mid-July, some two months after its installation.
“It is with great sadness that we announce the passing of Sgt. Quandarius Davon Stanley, a recently retired motor transport operator,” Captain Shkeila Milford-Glover, spokesperson for the 3rd Expeditionary Sustainment Command, said in a statement.
She did not say when Stanley died or what kind of injury he had sustained, specifying only that the soldier had been receiving treatment in a long-term care facility.
He was one of three US military personnel who suffered non-combat injuries at sea during the pier operation.
The two others suffered minor injuries, a sprained ankle and a hurt back, the military said in May.
In addition to the injuries, the project faced other problems starting in May, when the pier was damaged by bad weather and had to be removed for repairs.
It was then reattached on June 7, but was moved to Ashdod on June 14 to protect it from anticipated high seas — a situation that was repeated later in the month.
US President Joe Biden announced the pier project during his State of the Union address in March as Israel held up deliveries of assistance by land, and the Pentagon has said it helped push the Israeli government to open more aid routes.


Japanese prime minister praises Saudi Arabia’s role in addressing the Gaza crisis

Updated 31 min 34 sec ago
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Japanese prime minister praises Saudi Arabia’s role in addressing the Gaza crisis

  • PM Ishiba made the remarks during a telephone summit with Saudi Arabia’s Crown Prince Mohammed bin Salman
  • Ishiba stated that he would like to strengthen the strategic partnership between Japan and Saudi Arabia

TOKYO: Japanese Prime Minister Shigeru Ishiba hailed “Saudi Arabia’s leadership on Gaza” and expressed his determination to continue working with the Kingdom to bring stability to the Middle East.

Ishiba made the remarks during a telephone summit with Saudi Arabia’s Crown Prince Mohammed bin Salman on Tuesday, during which he expressed his hope that Saudi Arabia would continue to play a leading role in stabilizing the global oil market.

The Foreign Ministry in Tokyo said the crown prince expressed his wish to deepen cooperation with Japan in various fields, including politics, economics, security, and potentially technology transfer and cultural exchange.

Ishiba said he would like Japan and Saudi Arabia to expand cooperation to areas including clean energy, advanced technology, and entertainment.

With 2025 marking the 70th anniversary of the establishment of diplomatic relations between the two countries, Ishiba reiterated his commitment to peace and stability in the region. He stated that he would like to strengthen the strategic partnership between Japan and Saudi Arabia and work even more closely together to promote these values. The crown prince also affirmed his commitment to these goals, stating that Saudi Arabia attaches great importance to its relations with Japan and welcomes further cooperation.

The Foreign Ministry added that both leaders shared their concerns about conflicts in the Middle East and the need for all parties involved to exercise maximum restraint. Ishiba said he appreciated Saudi Arabia’s leadership on Gaza, and the two leaders agreed to continue working closely together to achieve stability in the Middle East.


Syrian state media: Israel attacked town near Lebanon border

Updated 32 min 41 sec ago
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Syrian state media: Israel attacked town near Lebanon border

DAMASCUS: An Israeli strike hit a Syrian town near the border with Lebanon on Tuesday, Syrian state media said, less than a week after deadly strikes on the same area.
“An Israeli aggression targeted the industrial zone in Al-Qusayr” in Homs province, the official SANA news agency said. There was no immediate news of casualties or damage.

Since the beginning of the Syrian civil war in 2011, Israel has carried out hundreds of strikes in Syria mainly targeting army positions and Iran-backed fighters including from Hezbollah.
The Israeli military has intensified its strikes on Syria since it launched its war on Hezbollah in neighbouring Lebanon.
Israeli authorities rarely comment on the strikes, but have repeatedly said they will not allow arch-enemy Iran to expand its presence in Syria.


Health ministry in Hamas-run Gaza says war death toll at 43,391

Updated 05 November 2024
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Health ministry in Hamas-run Gaza says war death toll at 43,391

  • The toll includes 17 deaths in the previous 24 hours

GAZA STRIP: The health ministry in Hamas-run Gaza said on Tuesday that at least 43,391 people have been killed in the year-old war between Israel and Palestinian militants.
The toll includes 17 deaths in the previous 24 hours, according to the ministry, which said 102,347 people have been wounded in the Gaza Strip since the war began when Hamas militants attacked Israel on October 7, 2023.